Robbing Uncle Sam: How 'Die Hard With A Vengeance' Hit A Little Too Close to Home

By Sean Tuohy

One New York City cop must stop a bunch of machine gun-toting terrorists from robbing The Federal Reserve Bank of New York by using bombs and the subway system. Completely unbelievable. Would never happen. Could not happen.

Wait, what? Maybe it could…?

The third installment of the long-running action franchise “Die Hard” was one of the best. Following our hero John McClane as he tries to stop the brother of Hans Gruber—the guy who fell out of a window in the first one—as he tries to rob the New York Federal Reserve by bombing a subway stop and then using trucks to drive through water tunnels. 

Screenwriter Jonathan Hensleigh states in the audio community for the film that while writing the script he wanted to find out how to actually rob one of the world's most important banks. The best way to do that? Probably plan a daring heist for months, right? Nope. Just walk in and ask for a tour. Yes, the building that holds the most amount of gold in the United States allowed a screenwriter to walk into the vault, let him hold a gold bar, and even told him that the nearby subway messes with security system all the time. We assume afterwards they told him where they hid the spare key (Spoiler alert: it’s under the fake rock out front).

Later, while Hensleigh was trying to figure out how to get the gold out of the city, he read that a new water duct tunnel was being built. Perfect. He added that to the finished script and turned it in.

At this point, the FBI was able to read said script with all the spare time they must have. They discovered a huge problem… All of it was possible! While writing an action movie, Hensleigh had created a very plausible plan to rob Uncle Sam. FBI agents eventually showed up at the studio’s office and started asking questions. “Die Hard With A Vengeance” was allowed to move forward but only after major changes were implemented at the Federal Reserve.

The spare key has since been moved to a secret location (it’s now under the plastic frog).

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Why 'Die Hard' Is the Ultimate Christmas Movie

By Sean Tuohy

It’s that time of year again when you put on a god-awful sweater, drink booze-heavy eggnog, and celebrate an obese man breaking into your home and eating your offering of store-bought cookies and soy milk.

Christmas is a wonderful time of the year, unless you’re elf because those tiny North Pole slaves are working unpaid overtime to manufacture your ungrateful kids’ gifts. This is a time when we come together and watch movies about the Christmas spirit.  There are many Christmas movies out there, but the one film that sums it up the holiday best is a little classic called “Die Hard.”

It’s the classic Christmas tale of an off-duty cop getting trapped in his wife’s office building during a terrorist takeover. Barefoot, outnumbered, and truly hating Twinkies, John McClane must save the day and, in essence, save Christmas.

Here are all the reasons I could think of for why “Die Hard” should be your go-to holiday movie for years to come:

It Shows the Importance of Being Kind and Helpful

This time of year, you have to be nice or else…a fat man in a red suit will hunt you down. With that thought in mind, limo driver Argyle helps his fellow man by giving McClane a lift from the airport and….smashing his car into the terrorist getaway van and punching a man in the face. True holiday spirit.

Don’t Be Mean

Terrorist Tony learns you shouldn’t be mean during this time of year after he chases our hero under a table with a machine gun and then gets shot in the crotch. 

Be Creative

You could buy your gifts or you could handcraft them like some kind of Third World family. If decide on the latter, you have to be creative just like McClane when he uses a corpse and a Santa hat to mess with the terrorists’ leader. Don’t forget how to use tape to hide your pistol on your sweat- and blood-soaked back.

Be Grateful

You have to enjoy the little things, just like McClane enjoys climbing through an air duct. “Now I know what a T.V. dinner feels like.” See, that’s a grateful man.

Don’t Lie

Hey, tell the truth. No one likes a liar, mostly because their pants are always on fire. Hans Gruber, the mastermind behind the terrorist plot, is a liar. He lies right to Eliis’ face and then shots him in that face.   Don’t worry, he gets what he deserves…no, not a fair trial followed by a prison sentence, but a free trip out of a window. Still better than your pants being on fire.

Being With Family

The most important part of the holidays is spending time with your loved ones. Even if both of you are in shock after a traumatic event and soaked in blood, it’s good to reconnect with one another.  

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